Anisha , after so long , I am wide awake in the early morning. You are sleeping peacefully beside me. It's only 3:30 AM. How I wish I could sleep ! How I wish I don't brood on thoughts which troubles me ! How I wish I could forget the pain ! It hurts , and I know what triggered it. Perhaps I should avoid the trigger all together. I just need to sleep. My mind keeps on searching for that one word , or one moment , which assures it's not all delusion - but all I find is , how deluded , hopeless and troublesome I was. Anisha , it hurts. People use tools , how stupid I was to believe otherwise !
Amma
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